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Symphony orchestra bristles at being called cover band

VIENNA, NE – The Vienna Philharmonic Orchestra responded sharply to the group’s characterization in local media as a “cover band”.

“This dismissive, diminutive term is, although technically accurate, wholly inappropriate,” said Otto Bohn, conductor of the orchestra.

The 80-piece ensemble is comprised of string, woodwind, horn and percussive instruments. They play a wide range of music written by composers not in the band, such as W. Mozart, L. Beethoven and A. Copland.

Local music beat reporter Hank Callas defends his description of the orchestra in the weekend edition of the Vienna Husk.

“As soon as they come to me with a viable replacement for ‘cover’, I’ll use it,” said Callas. “And they are definitely a band. If some other band gets up on stage and plays the Ring Cycle, does it matter what instruments they use?”

Sources with the orchestra report tensions between Callas and Bohn dating back to an open mic incident at the Hogback Roadhouse in 2005.

Muligan Stewart

Muligan Stewart

Mulligan types neatly and is punctual. He graduated summa cum dolus from William Gaines School of Journalism. Do not ever touch his stereo.

One Response

  1. Kath

    Choked on my sandwich as I read this at Panera. The adjoining patrons were not amused.

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