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Scotty “Squatty” Watson closing in on record for fewest strikeouts

TITUS, AL – A minor league player is soon to catch up with the all-time baseball record for fewest strikeouts in a career.

Scotty “Squatty” Watson is 4 feet, 8 inches tall (1.42m) and has an especially short torso and thighs, giving him by far the smallest strike zone of any player.

Still in the minor leagues playing for the East Oregon Rainshadows, Watson hopes to take his unique advantage with him to the major leagues one day.

“He’s not the greatest hitter, and a mediocre left fielder,” said Rainshadows manager Turks Cobell at winter training camp in Alabama. “But none of these pitchers can get in that strike zone. We got a walk machine in Squatty.”

His lower legs and arms are of average size, which help to make up for any obstacles competing with larger players. “He can field a ground ball without bending over,” said Cobell.

Muligan Stewart

Muligan Stewart

Mulligan types neatly and is punctual. He graduated summa cum dolus from William Gaines School of Journalism. Do not ever touch his stereo.

2 Responses

  1. Michael DeFilippo

    How many strikeouts? Geez

  2. Anonymous

    Hi, Michael. I'm Buzz McClintock with the East Oregon Rainshadows baseball organization. Your comment is important to us and we want to provide you with an answer as quickly as possible. However, since baseball scores and statistics from our franchise are copyrighted material, we are not at this time able to publish them on non-paid news outlets. If you start a subscription at you can view Squatty's record along with many other selected stats and scores.

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