WEATHER: Might rain, might not – hard to say. Chance of sun and/or clouds, temps between -46 and 120℉
TRAFFIC: Bad where you are, also other places. Stay home
HOROSCOPE: Chance favors the prepared. Don’t buy into vague generalities. Reject platitudes and forge your own path. We’ve been over this.
SPORTS: Local major league franchise scores more points than other local franchise. Losing coach: “We should have scored more points.”
EVENTS: Your friend’s band that you have no intention of ever seeing is playing tonight. There’s some kind of loud festival going on this weekend and you won’t be able to park anywhere near the farmer’s market
MARKETS: ₳ 86.7 ㏎ 53.09 ㏄ 2.4 ⅐ 4.6 ㏒ 808 ☈ 10.0 ㎏ 3gd ₤ 902.25 ü 21.12 ฿ AFL1-3603 ℗ 19.84 ℀ x86 ッ3.14159 ℅ 2.718 § .57721 ‱ 4.6692 € 6.66 ₩ 1.618 ⅜ a2+b2=c2 ₭ ¤ ₴ ㎡ 69 ø 420 ⌫ 555 ∄ XIV ⌘ 24/7/365 ə
POLITICS: Holy crap, how does this keep getting worse
SCIENCE: Revolutionary medical breakthrough still ten to twenty years away

Oil dips below $100 with new “Fun Size” barrels

NEW YORK – Forecasters predict that regular-sized barrels of light sweet crude oil will likely continue above $100 through 2008, but big producers have introduced a new $40 “fun size” barrel to create the perception of cheaper oil.

“It worked for candy bars and burgers, why not commodities?” said oil speculator Earl Shale. “People get used to paying a little less for a lot less.”

The new barrels will not reduce prices at the pump, where gas is still sold in the U.S. by the gallon.

“You never know, though,” said Shale. “Folks might like the idea of paying a buck for a liter of gas. It’s all packaging.”

Muligan Stewart

Muligan Stewart

Mulligan types neatly and is punctual. He graduated summa cum dolus from William Gaines School of Journalism. Do not ever touch his stereo.

Chinese Hackers Steal Netflix Password, 1 Billion People Now Watching On One Account

Chinese Hackers Steal Netflix Password, 1 Billion People Now Watching On One Account

SHANGHAI – Computer hackers apparently in China have broken into one U.S. citizen’s Netflix account and have shared the password,

The average amount of seconds a reader will squint at a confusing statistic before giving up
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