32,000 FT. OVER ASH VALLEY, KS – Passengers on Southwest flight 2672 went about their business aboard the plane, unaware of the vast, sprawling expanses of farmland lurking just beneath the cloud cover beneath them.
“There’s an endless sea of monotonous agricultural patchwork as far as the eye can see, and they’re missing it,” said Ian Jetmore, a business traveler who recently took an unspecified anti-anxiety medication. “We’re traversing the breadbasket of this nation, and the significance of it is going completely unnoticed.”
This flight was not equipped with WiFi or seat-back screens that sometimes provide onboard flight tracking, so none in the passenger area could be certain of their exact location above the predominantly rural region. Jetmore attempted to garner concern from his fellow passengers, but was speaking far too quietly to be understood.
Flight attendant Kris Nichols listened intently to Jetmore’s overture, and responded with a smile and a package of pretzels. The flight later landed without incident.