WEATHER: Might rain, might not – hard to say. Chance of sun and/or clouds, temps between -46 and 120℉
TRAFFIC: Bad where you are, also other places. Stay home
HOROSCOPE: Chance favors the prepared. Don’t buy into vague generalities. Reject platitudes and forge your own path. We’ve been over this.
SPORTS: Local major league franchise scores more points than other local franchise. Losing coach: “We should have scored more points.”
EVENTS: Your friend’s band that you have no intention of ever seeing is playing tonight. There’s some kind of loud festival going on this weekend and you won’t be able to park anywhere near the farmer’s market
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SCIENCE: Revolutionary medical breakthrough still ten to twenty years away

Crappy lo-fi album released in HD audio for some reason

SAN DIEGO, CA – An album universally considered to be one of the worst of the last 10 years is being released in high definition (HD) audio this week.

Solo artist Joey Vreeslike’s debut effort, “Sad Man and Rain” is, according to critics and listeners, badly written, badly performed and badly recorded. Only 5 listeners have gotten past the first few seconds of each track on Vreeslike’s Spotify stream.

Now the album is being distributed in 24-bit, 96kHz format – several times more resolution than CD quality (16-bit, 44.1kHz), to the puzzlement of nearly everyone concerned.

“This pile of mush sounds like it was recorded with a can opener,” said record store owner Morton Weber. “Even if someone likes it, I really don’t see what benefit they’re going to get listening to it in higher quality. They probably spent more time on the cover art than the whole album.”

The artwork featured on the album is not even the artist. Apparently the cover picture was snagged from a photo site.

Muligan Stewart

Muligan Stewart

Mulligan types neatly and is punctual. He graduated summa cum dolus from William Gaines School of Journalism. Do not ever touch his stereo.

Saloon patron does not particularly care for your tone of voice, mister

Saloon patron does not particularly care for your tone of voice, mister

SAGEBRUSH, CO – Standing right there at the bar is one fellow who did not at all cotton to your

Coca-Cola attracts younger market with “Pepsi Coke”

Coca-Cola attracts younger market with “Pepsi Coke”

Coke has been tinkering for years with a formula to compete with Pepsi, and now they’ve taken it to the

The average amount of seconds a reader will squint at a confusing statistic before giving up
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